1. Full moons still scare me.
Brings out the crazies . . .
every time.
2. I can’t eat at Chipotle without feeling like I’m on call. Burritos are the all-time best make-it-through-a-night-of-hell food.
I think my burrito
just paged me for a case.
3. Speaking of pagers, the sound of one immediately increases my pulse by at least thirty percent.
Bad Pager!
Bad! Bad! Bad!
4. I refuse to go out in the cold. I spent the past thirteen years freezing my butt off in a meat locker/OR, and I never want to be cold again.
Welcome to OR 3!
5. I can’t chew gum. Gum used to sustain me in the OR when I couldn’t get out to eat. Juicy fruit or lunch — is there really a difference?
No Mo!
6. Every holiday, I have the urge to check my calendar and verify I’m not on call.
Yeah, right!
Unless you’re stuck in an OR!
7. Every time I get up to pee, I think about how lucky I am to have unrestricted toilet access.
You mean I don’t have to wait another five hours?
8. It still seems weird to lie in my bed, shut my eyes, and sleep through the night . . . every night of the year.
So this is what people do at night?
Who knew?
9. Every time I dye my gray roots (yes, I am in mid-life maintenance mode), I remember the Thanksgiving morning that I was called to the OR stat two minutes after applying gunk to my hair.
You’ve got to be kidding!
I just put this crap on!
10. I still hate scummy lawyers.
Ready. Aim. Fire!
